CARPOOL Gala Weekend - 2006

Where to begin on a weekend such as the one I and some of my closest friends have just bared witness...

The weekend started out well. Britt and I promised ourselves and each other on the drive down to College Station that we would attempt to stay drama-free, meaning no fighting, no throwing tantrums, and no Schief-bashing (ok, well, try to keep it to a minimum anyway). Fortunately for us, the first two came true, and to the chagrin of comedy itself, so did the latter. As it turns out, there is really no longer any need to even worry about the latter because it's over, and the situation is unfortunate for a handful of people, and that's about it. So like I said, the weekend started off well.

Britt and I left Dallas around 6:30 pm, a little later than anticipated, but spirits were high. We were in her new convertible, but unfortunately, had we put the top down, the 97 mph wind would have converted our faces into Rocky Dennis Look-a-Like Contestants (oh, that wasn't the only Rocky Dennis reference of the weekend either...you'll see).

After a delightful trip to the Waco Cici's, where the NASCAR crowd was in full effect, we headed down to 2315 Auburn Court, my old stomping grounds. To our great delight, Danny, Ben, and Sara Langlitz were awaiting with some Miller Lite and the cheapest bottle of Vodka Ben could skim off the one bum that roams the streets of Brentwood. To our dismay, Jace was stuck at home in Fort Worth, waiting on his dry-cleaning and cleaning up the 37 Grilled Stuft Burrito wrappers in his bedroom. However unpure, the vodka did the trick, mixed in huge glasses with a touch of Red Bull (particularly for Danny), and the night was started off right.

Before leaving on a reunion night at Northgate, the five of us got into a healthy debate about how one might distinguish bear arms on a man vs. any other type of hairy animal. I suggested gorillas, but Ben refuted, citing opposable thumbs. He then suggested wildabeasts, but that was right out, because they have hooves. Finally, Danny exclaimed werewolf men transformed from having thumbs to no longer having thumbs, to which I argued, claiming the mutant wolf creature on TMNT II: Secret of the Ooze in fact had thumbs. Danny flawlessly rebutted me, proclaiming, "A: That was a movie...wolfmen are REAL!". Who could argue with logic like that? We all conceded defeat to Danny's wisdom, and headed to the bars.

Once out, the good times rolled...and rolled...and rolled...and rolled...akanarollllllleld...alndlkjtajlkjl........................you get the picture. They rolled all the way back to 2315 downstairs bath for me, and of course the Mother Teresa of friends and loved ones who've had "too much fun", Brittany, was there to take care of me. God bless her in many ways. We all woke up too early the next morning, and 1 El Patron meal and 15 Advil later, I was ready for the Gala.

Going back a step, Jace arrived early in the afternoon, and after ffejing about for a good portion of the day, he, Ben, Danny, and I went to shoot some hoops. After quickly tiring of 2 on 2 full-court, we invented a game on the tennis court where we played tennis with the basketball, throwing the ball with one hand back and forth. It was even worse than it sounds as I describe it to you. Hopefully someone from Uzbekistan reads this and turns this game into an Olympic sport so they can win a medal, however, let me say that even someone who wins at a game like this is still truly a loser.

So, after a farce of athleticism, we trudged home to shower and get ready for Gala. Everyone in the house looked brilliant and full of life, and we headed up to the beautiful, brand new, Miramont Country Club. After gladhanding a few of the highrollers, we made our way to the silent auction items. The layout, the items, and the women all looked fabulous; particularly one Miss David, but it's been said that I am biased. I also think my nephew is a prodigy, so what, someone have a problem with that?

Most everyone at our table bid on and won some sort of auction items, so that made the night even more fun and interesting. Jace put in for a gaggle of raffle tickets and ended up winning a live auction item; a two-day fishing trip to South Padre. Pretty awesome, and honestly, poetic justice; written in iambic pentameter to be exact. The most far-fetched situation however, was when I got up to go pay for my item with 15 seconds left in the live auction, and when it's over, I find out Ben bought a 3 month old labrador and immediately sold it for net $(150). This was but the first time I would let Ben out of my site for less than half a minute and he get himself into some sort crazy antics.

Jace, Ben, Sara, Britt, and I all went home extremely satisfied and very excited about the state of CARPOOL. Come to find out, nothing has really changed, as the after-after-party was scheduled at my house that I no longer live in and none of my old roommates are in CARPOOL. Sounds about right, doesn't it?

After changing, we caught up with Danny, Alex, and Danny's brother (a big brother to us all) Wiley. Wiley was in town in order to avoid having to be at his house while his live-in girlfriend who he gave the boot packed up and left. No surprise that Wiley was extremely intoxicated by the end of the night, and out of three young ladies there with him, ended up making out with the one most closely resembling Rocky Dennis (I told you there was one more). The night was great, and we all saw a lot of friends we had not in a while, including one Harrison Tucker, up from UH Law. It was great to see that guy, along with many others. I even convinced my old (old as in nature of our working relationship, not like haggard) advisor, the one and only T-Boyle, to come out and traverse the scene with us for a while. Times were good.

Plenty of Gatorade at the end of the night prevented any unwanted nausea in the morning, and as we all finally awoke, cleaned up, and went our seperate ways, most of us didn't want the weekend to end. It was a brilliant glimmer of our not too distant past, and it couldn't have shined any brighter.

Thanks to all for a weekend for the books, and this one won't even need an asterisk.